My last babies first year . . .

Enzo Reed Dickerson
June 10, 2014 7:30 pm
8 lb 7 oz 22 inches

One year ago today, I was pacing the neighborhood, climbing hills, begging my body to go into labor and STAY in labor.   You would think that with your sixth baby, my body would have it figured out, but stress (which I tend to carry) tends to put a damper on life in every sense, even labor.  My hubs company decided it was crucial to start a call center out of the country one month before my due date.  He has been gone two weeks of almost every month since.  Two of those trips surrounded the due date of baby number 6.  I had a very slight window.  Three days if I remember correctly to either go into labor and have that babe or risk having him while my husband was out of town.  No pressure, right?  None of my labors or deliveries have been quite the same.  A week over for number 1.  Ten days early for number 2 (which lets be honest he was actually late since he weighed nearly 9 lbs.).  Two weeks early and a surprise you're in labor and ten minutes later baby number 3 was here.   Two weeks late (after being dilated to a 6, fully effaced for a month) for number 4 (yes he is still stubborn).  Two days early with the longest slowest labor of my life for number 5.  That brings us to this sweet boy.  Besides the stress of getting him here in his precise window, I couldn't have asked for a better labor and delivery.  Apparently the secret is a good chiropractic adjustment to untwist my twistiness and eggplant parmesan (as prescribed by my chiropractor).  I kid you not, five minutes after eating eggplant parmesan I was having consistent contractions, five minutes apart.  I labored (which for me is kind of a joke as I do not really feel my contractions) for about 2 hours.  I had three really good painful contractions, stepped into the bath to relieve the pain, and halfway in there was baby.    

So So Squishy

 I have said it before, but it remains to be true, this baby has been a saving blessing in my life.  He keeps me present when I want to escape.  He softens me, when I am at my hardest.  He calms me when I feel like I will never stop crying.  Babies truly are miracles.  This one is more evident to me than any.  

Perfect Baby Boy

 When I found out I was pregnant with this sweet boy, I immediately went into denial for 20 weeks.  My body even believed my denial.  I literally did not look pregnant.  The only reason I sort of believed it was the constant nausea and throwing up that never stopped.  There is something about seeing that little alien human shadow on an ultrasound though that sets reality in.  When I saw that, I was happy, I accepted it, and my 6th boy was finally real in my mind.    

Happy, Smiley, Cute

 It is still sometimes hard to believe that I have 6 boys.  Sometimes it doesn't even feel like that many.  Other times, I realize why I am so crazy :)  I sure am thankful that God knew to send me one more.  I am happy that he truly knows what I need.  I never would have thought that another baby would be a good idea.  That being said, I sure hope we are on the same page now being that I AM DONE.  

This baby's baby time flew way too fast.  I just want to keep him little and chubby and squishy and sweet for forever.  He is my velcro baby, and even if it makes getting anything done very difficult, I love it!  I love that as soon as he is on my hip, his screaming stops instantly.  I love that every time he sees me, his whole face smiles.  I love that if I walk into the room, he instantly thinks he needs me when he was perfectly fine playing before.  I love that he is my baby.  

My last baby.  It is a weird thing to accept.  With each new phase in his life, a phase in mine is ending.  It is harder than I could have imagined as I thought I was done after baby number 4.  It aches a little to think that I will never hold a newborn throughout the day and night ever again.  I will never anticipate rolling, sitting, crawling and first steps again.  I will never have all the little baby firsts again.  However, there is an end in sight to the thousands of diapers I thought would never end! 

I love my little Enzo.  Happy birthday to my last baby boy!   

Too Big, Too Fast